Childhood, a time when we’re taken care of as fragile and vulnerable people is quite different than adulthood. As adults, we begin to follow a new set of rules and understand over time that we’re interesting to ourselves only. There’s no one to push us toward success, give us their shoulder to cry on, or praise us when we’ve done something good. And ultimately, there are always going to be people who are smarter, better, and more attractive than us.
1. There’s no point in sacrificing yourself for others.
Have you ever heard the phrase, “Everything I do, I do it for you”? As a rule, it’s followed by a cold answer, “But did I even ask you to do that?”
Let’s be honest: the people around us don’t need our sacrifices. Most often, they feel awkward and become irritated by this obtrusiveness. The only exception to this situation is codependent behavior — when both people get satisfaction from such a relationship.
2. None of us will get a medal at work.
They say it was a horse who worked the most in the village, but it still never became the head of the village. Sooner or later you’ll face a similar unpleasant truth: your boss and colleagues will understand that you are ready to do any kind of work. And while you’re hurting your health by putting too much pressure on yourself, they’ll be calmly checking their newsfeed on social media or gossiping while sipping on another cup of coffee. But were you really expecting for your boss to praise you for hard work like your teacher would do back in kindergarten?
3. Body positivity is not about the absence of self-care.
Unshaved armpits, cracked nails, and a refusal to use hygiene products will likely make you look like an untidy person rather than a follower of body-positivity. The main idea of this body-positive movement is to treat other people respectfully and accept any appearance worthily.
At the same time, bold phrases like, “I love my rolls” usually hides laziness, shows a lack of motivation to hit the gym and proves they treat their health irresponsibly.
4. Appearance matters.
You can endlessly talk about your rich inner world and the beauty of your soul but the phrase, “people judge a book by its cover” still holds true. It’s not only one’s professional skills that they assess at interviews but also the appearance of the candidate, as well as their ability to communicate with other people. Additionally, a confident and tidy-looking person has more of a chance to go on a successful date than an untidy one.
5. Being a good person is not a profession.
No one has to treat you well at work for having beautiful eyes, 3 kids, a mortgage, 4 loans, and a sick mom. Bosses will always be primarily interested in the quality of your work. If you’re not bringing any profit to the company you work at, prepare to be replaced by a more energetic and hard-working person at any moment.
6. Your mom isn’t always right.
Over time, we stop perceiving the words and behaviors of our parents as an eternal and indubitable truth. Our childhood ideology gets replaced by the understanding that a mother and father are ordinary people who have their disadvantages, bad habits, and thoughts that aren’t always wise and true. That being said, they could make a bunch of mistakes in how they react to your behavior as well. This may sound sad, but sooner or later your own kids will become disappointed in you as well.